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Brian Giselbach's avatar

The apostle Paul said that some circumstances demand that we not sit at the table with someone (1 Corinthians 5).

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JL Gerhardt's avatar

You're not wrong. Paul says, "not even to eat with such a one" about the brother who's decided to continue in a sexual sin. Of course we know from other passages that before the church would "purge" someone from their midst, they'd take the time to sit with them and listen and explain the consequences if they decided to choose their sin over the community. These are the passages I'm wrestling with right now as I try to figure out what to do when two people both think they're right according to scripture. It's trickier. In this case in I Corinthians 5, the offender didn't question whether or not he was disobeying God's law and that made things easier--clearer at least.

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Brian Giselbach's avatar

Thank you for your reply. Yes, it is a bit trickier, for sure. Perhaps a couple of ways of deciding the trickier situations:

1. Decide (within yourself) the core reason why a position is being taken (resulting in a disagreement of scripture). Perhaps it is not a specific issue that is the problem, but something more fundamental—like the attitude one has of God, or the larger hermeneutical approach that is being taken. All approaches are not equal, nor are all attitudes toward God equal. If my friend is is humble toward God, even if we disagree about something the Bible teaches, I feel entirely comfortable enjoying all aspects of friendship. Humility is one of the main things to me (and most of all, to God).

2. The teaching of the Bible almost always leads to action/behavior. Not always, but often. So it is important to look at the outcome of a person’s study. For example: The view of God that His grace cancels law creates an outcome that, if generally adopted, leads to misbehavior. I believe that grace and law are related, and that they work in conjunction. This disagreement becomes unsettling. On the other hand, I recently had a discussion with someone about the indwelling of the Spirit in a believers life. We disagreed about this, but we both hold to the view that the Spirit exerts a sanctifying influence. So the outcome is the same.

These are just some of my ramblings.

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JL Gerhardt's avatar

Both of those points are helpful! And yes, yes on humility--anytime I see humility and the fruit of the Spirit in someone with whom I disagree I'm quick to listen and slow to speak.

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Roberta Pledge's avatar

Thank you so much for these thoughts. Church is family and sometimes family disagree. I like that you stand behind family. I'm often very disturbed by those who walk away from church and throw stones back at it. Thank you for your positives on disagreement. May the Lord bless your family in this new walk.

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Gil T's avatar

Always sooo good to read the words and thoughts of your mind, and, yes, your words are quite true, Jennifer.

Unity, as I believe many of us envision it, is about working to get others to think and act alike with us. The truth of my experiences has revealed to me that there is a much greater dynamic and liveliness to be enjoyed, both in the persons and the disagreements between them. Here' one example.

I've often wondered about the LORD God watching as Eve contemplated eating the forbidden fruit. Then she offered the fruit to Adam. Will he take it and eat with her and stay with her or will he reject the fruit which his wife offered him?

I believe (ALERT: huge, wide open door for disagreement here!) it pleased the LORD God when Adam made his choice to stay in company and fellowship with his wife whom the LORD God had given him. It pleased the LORD God, not that they sinned, a matter which he was quite well prepared and willing to handle for Adam and Eve and all the children who would come from them. For Adam to have abandoned Eve would have been a heartbreak for her to be alone, and an even bigger heartbreak for the LORD God.

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Brian Giselbach's avatar

Yes, I will walk through the door of disagreement. God was not pleased that Adam stood by his wife. The Lord even criticized Adam for listening to his wife. When one is faced with the choice between what God is saying and what others are saying, we need to choose God.

This is not abandoning our relationships with others. It is guiding our relationships toward God. God is heartbroken when we are not willing to forsake all for Him.

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Mira Prkut Kovačić's avatar

I am often amazed and chalenged by what you write but this just hit the spot. The balance Jesus had and we are invited to live- loving the man but hating the sin- is jjst what I have been thinking about lately. You put it so well- there are some tables to flip and some to sit at! Thank you for this chalenge

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